This is going to be messy. And I mean that in the best sort of way.
That’s because life is messy and hard, but it’s also beautiful. Can you relate?
You see, I’ve been going through a transition, and it’s time to get real. As a friend recently told me, at some point, you can’t cheat the process anymore.
For the last few years, there has been a growing desire inside of me to move in a new direction.
I finally had to ask myself, why are you waiting?
Finding Your Voice
I feel like I’ve been floundering a bit. Trying to find my voice. There’s been a lot of stuff to sort through because all I’ve known for the past twenty years is church ministry.
I’m not leaving the ministry, but I am looking to spend 50% or more of my time outside the church. For those of you that don’t know, I’m also a pastor, but I really want to spend more of my time writing, speaking, coaching, and gathering a group of messy and courageous people who want to forge a path together, learn to live from a place of wholeness, and bring their true self to the world every day.
This shift has been coming for a while, and it is part necessity and part calling. The necessity part has to do with our financial resources drying up. Small church, big city, big expenses mean if you lose a few donors, you’re in trouble. The truth is we are struggling and we’ve got about a month or two before something has to change.
There, I said it.
That was really hard for me. It’s not hard for me to admit my challenges to a few people but publicly on my blog? That’s incredibly hard for me! Like I said, this is going to be messy! And just so you know, this is not a plea to get you to feel bad for me and give me money. It’s just the reality. I would never stoop that low.
The reality is, sometimes we won’t jump out of the nest until we are pushed out.
The calling part is simple. I’ve had a growing desire to make an impact in the lives of people outside of my current church context.
And I think who I am and what I carry is going to really help people.
So, I’m going to start getting uncomfortably honest about my journey because I believe that’s what people want and need. You don’t just need tips, tricks, and hacks although they come in handy sometimes.
You need people who are real with you and people with whom you can be real.
And I’m willing to go first. That’s part of who I am. Pioneer. Risk-taker. Explorer. Dreamer. Seeker. Entrepreneurial. Creator.
I know who I am. Isn’t it about time you find out who you are?
Authenticity Is Not Vulnerability
It might make some people uncomfortable. Heck, it makes me uncomfortable to be vulnerable. There is a difference between vulnerability and authenticity. Authenticity means being your true self wherever you are.
Vulnerability is sharing things that make your palms sweat a little.
Vulnerability leaves you feeling emotionally exposed, but it’s also necessary if you want to go deeper with people.
Part of the reason vulnerability is hard for me is because I’m such a forward thinker. I confront my stuff head-on and deal with it. Then I move on and I don’t talk about it much. I don’t like going back. But what I’ve realized is this: it doesn’t help other people if I’m not willing to share the messy stuff.
I’m not talking about sharing from gaping wounds. That would be inappropriate and unhelpful. No, I’m talking about sharing real things, even hard things, whether past or present, that are helpful.
It’s much easier to relate to someone who shares from their failures and weaknesses than from their successes. I’ve known people who only tell you their successes.
What I’ve found is this: if someone is too good to be true they usually are.
In the next post, I’m going to start sharing about a long struggle to find and live from a place of wholeness. I’m going to be gut-level honest…uncomfortably so, but it’s also going to open up a whole lotta stuff that I’m convinced will be really helpful.
And I hope you will be gut-level honest about your journey too. Because we all need people we can be that real with. And for whatever reason, the church doesn’t always seem to be the safest place to do that.
There are some cool things coming down the pike that I’m working on, and I can’t wait to share them with you. More to come on that…
Where Do We Go from Here?
If this sounds good to you, I would love to go on this journey…together.
The best way to do that is to join my email list. I don’t always post on my blog, but I always send at least one weekly email. Not to mention you will get my free resource Crafting a Life-giving Daily Rhythm and Routine when you sign up.
If not, that’s OK too. No hard feelings. I’m not for everyone.
I would love to hear about your messy journey or hear feedback on this. Feel free to leave a comment below…
Check Out the Whole Series…
This is the prequel to a series I call Rhythms of Life. You can access the whole series here:
- Rhythms of Life Intro: Why Burnout Was One of the Best Things That Ever Happened to Me
- Rhythms of Life 1: A State of Wholeness
- Rhythms of Life 2: To the Beat of A Different Drum
- Rhythms of Life 3: Relationships Are Rocketships…Or Submarines
- Rhythms of Life 4: Who Will Bleed with You?
- Rhythms of Life 5: Lean Into Your Limitations